time flies but also it crawls

so much, so little has happened since my last post. so big, so small the details of my life. imagine, if you willst whilst you read this text, that it's in a white type set amid the backdrop image of a ocean horizon at dusk, pinks, purples and blues aswirl above. maybe it's a hallmark image, maybe it's the cheesy image i've selected as the screen saver on my work computer (it's not, actually, that is currently a knock-out image of a wall at the al-khazar in sevilla). but still, imagine it. imagine you and me and me and you holding hands and swinging them forward, backward, around and around, until, frankly, we get cricks in our shoulders and necks. how we yearn for massages! imagine you lean in for a kiss, or i do, but accidentally (is it accidentally on purpose?) we clack our teeth together and it hurts a little. imagine we lean for a kiss and our noses knock, our foreheads clock and we retreat in sweet wonder. oh. so sweet.

aiight. enough. not much goings on. my super and i have yet to go out. but he calls and leaves me the sweetest messages (on thanksgiving, per exempio, he left me one telling me repeatedly to 'just relax and have a good day cause you're a hardworking woman and you should just relax.') and i swear to my brother's dog kobe from japan that he's making me grow a crush on him.

but then the other night. wait, no need for 'but.' so, the other day, i had a dream i was pregnant. which is strange because it was at that time not possible insofar as i was menstruating (too gross? it's biological, so i think it's a-okay. but does mike huckabee believe in menstruation? he's got issues with evolution, after all. if he gets elected, will i be arrested? it makes you think, huh. think on it.) but i was pregnant with the offspring of my waiter friend, mr. kosovo 2007, who i saw two weeks ago and have heard no peeps from since. not that i have peeped either. i think, in fact, our amour has peaked, to squeak no more, though i did, against better judgement (and what else is new?) text the other day and at the same time wondered, why? why? oh, i know exactly why and it's spelled D-E-W-A-R-S. (actually, spelled Famous Grouse, but that brand is less well known, and sweeter). not that i don't think he's cute and emminently kissable, but really, where is the where? what is the what? he wants to get a job (oops, first i wrote mob, which might be freudian because i have this idea he is in one even though he's not macho or overbearing and i don't think he's got a glock or a shiv) in nj, and i live in nyc; second, he doesn't really call me and i'm tired of calling him. and seeing someone once every 2-3 weeks for a date doesn't quite have the momentum i crave.

as for the set ups. well, all you mopes are falling down on the job! step it up! how many times do i gotta tell you? you're in the union, for cryin' out loud! make those dues work for me! maybe i should try extortion. then i could join a mob too.